Showing posts with label pacing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pacing. Show all posts

Saturday, June 17, 2017

Is routine the key to living well with illness?

Lots of thoughts this morning. About meditation, medication, routine, pacing, finding my way again.

Meditation

The power of meditation to feel how my body truly feels. And not to mask pain totally with pain medication.
A fine line, I think.

Medication

Yes, I do take pain medication. I am very glad to have them.
After many trails over the years of strong pain relief, I now mainly use very basic medication. The more drastic ones all had me end up living like a zombie, or had too many side effects, which made life more intolerable in different ways. (Note: This is my experience. I am sure that we all have different views on this.)

There are days that I find it important to really see/feel how my body is functioning.
By taking too much pain medication, there is the change that I continually overdo it, because I don't feel the pain which activities are causing. The danger arises that I end up in a vicious circle.
... if that makes sense...?

Preventative pain relief

I do take pain medication in advance of an activity, when I know I simply don't have a choice not to overdo it. Like for travel, or extended outings.
Sometimes I take pain medication when I am in the middle of an activity where there is no choice but to keep going. I can hardly lie down in a shop, or on the street when I can no longer function due to pain or fatigue. The basic Paracetamol seems to work for this to some degree.
In the hospital I was advised to take paracetamol on a routine basis. I followed this advise for the Holland adventures, but am now trying to take less again.

... and dealing with pain after doing too much

Other times I have already grossly overstayed my own welcome in being kind and considerate to my body...
Like yesterday.
Where I had a friend help me in the garden to do some weeding. She did not mind at all, at all, if I did nothing but observe. But I LOVE being involved in my garden so I did my bit of weeding. Sitting down. But I did too much. I felt ill. In so much pain. I spend the rest of the afternoon on the bench in the garden and on the couch. So, yes. I did dowse myself with pain relief. And yes I did feel a bit better after a few hours. But is that really the answer?

I don't think it is.
Sculpture by Corina Duyn, showing a head and outstreched arm with a bird in the hand. view of sea and cliffs.
'Wisdom' sculpture by Corina Duyn 2015, background view is in Dzogchen Beara

So, back to meditation

Hence I started my day with meditation, to really explore where I am at. How to proceed. How to get back to being well again. Well within illness. Well without putting too many chemicals into my body. Well by listening to my body.

I would like to get back to my routine. To stay within my levels of ability. Which due to the surgery and the 'hospital-Holland-marathon' has taken a good few steps backwards.

I know that for me routine is the key to living well with illness. 

I need to get back to:

  • To eat well. To not put the 'wrong fuel in my body'.
  • To just be. Be with whatever is happening.
That is my plan.

What is your plan?

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Finding new ways to be part of society - through the written word.

Thanks for stopping by!

I seem to be ill at ease at the moment - or perhaps for the past few months. I see it as a time to re-evaluate 'where I am at'. What do I want? What do I like? What am I capable of doing - within these thoughts?  What is it that I don't like, or cost me so much energy that it negatively effects my health and well being? Physically and mentally.

Two sides of sheet from Into the Light book in a box
A few months ago I had a solo exhibition, and even before this event I knew it was to be a challenge beyond my capabilities (at that time).
Not so much the creative side of things, as I had plenty of sculptures, a few tapestries, my books, and I very much enjoyed making the prints from the Into the Light images and quotes. All that creative stuff I can do in my own time.
Over the years of living with ME/CFS I have managed to learn the act of pacing, and made it into a fine art!

The challenges were all the 'other stuff'. The logistics of getting me and my art/books to the gallery (I don't drive); to organise accommodation for a few nights so I could divide up the energy required for travel, from being present at the setting up of the show, and the actual launch night, and recover enough to travel back again. Having to deal with the gallery, organising the promotion etc. etc.
It took me months to recover from all this, and maybe my recent health challenges are a result from this event.

The good stuff of course is that it is really lovely to share my work with others. To receive heartwarming comments in the guestbook or via email. How my journey-through-life touches other people. My work is all about that. Or at least partly.
I create because I simply have to. My life has gone that way. But the sharing is certainly a beautiful side-effect.

For the story behind this image
and more about the exhibition, please see here
I swore I won't have another exhibition. But I had already one booked. A shared exhibition with my fellow Irish Wheelchair Association (IWA) members to highlight our Abilities. I just have to be very sure that I mind myself as best I can over the next month, to delegate the jobs, to have the IWA staff and members do their share of jobs.

All will be well on the day!

After my solo exhibition, I made a plan not to plan, if you know what I mean... No plans for big creative adventures, although of course I am creating. And finding a more manageable way to be part of society -  through the written word.
Through this Blog.

It took me months to get to today. But I have arrived.

I endeavour to write more often about life (with illness) - the challenging stuff, but also the beauty that I see and experience. The raw thoughts.

As I don't follow much of the medical trials I will refer to other people's blogs for that information, or see the ME/SFS information page here.

I hope you will join me along this journey.

With much love,

Corina