Sunday, November 1, 2020


Life is peculiar. Life is never linear. Life can be like a rollercoaster ride with its gentle rolls where one can take a deep breath of relief only to experience those terrifying highs and lows again. Such is life. Presently lots is changing. In terms of my health. In terms of the care I require. As well as changes in my care team. Lots to comprehend. Time to rewrite - time for a new era. 

For months I am engaging in ‘space-clearing’. Bit by bit I am letting go of anything I either don’t really need, or no longer require, or don’t particularly like. Or would be of more use in someone else’s life. Even books. My tv. I keep what I need, what brings me joy, which has memories attached I simply am not ready yet to let go off.

Some of these decisions were dictated by a change in health. Over a short time I became more and more unable to tolerate the clothes I loved for years. Many a morning I’d be close to tears by the thought of having to get dressed. Clothes brought an extreme reaction to the sensation of touch. Of being trapped. Even clothes which were not tight. I’d tolerate t-shirts for a few seconds before I had to ask my carers to pull them off straight away. Panic. I could no longer deal with trousers which were baggy and made ‘noise’ when I walked. I couldn’t deal with a shirts because of the collars. I was at a total loss on what to wear. 

Like a snake I shedded my skin - my clothes.

I bought a new set of clothes. Big, soft clothes. Just a few pieces. When I decided to do this big ‘culling’ of my wardrobe it actually felt liberating... After the few tears of letting go of my once beloved clothes. It was a letting go of another era. Most of my wardrobe now has new homes- new bodies. I am comfortable again in my new skin. My new clothes. And marvel at how little I need. Still more to let go.

Letting go of the old - makes room for the new.

Books. Ah, books. Letting go of books used to be a challenge. I used to love, absolutely love my library of books. Then suddenly I was overwhelmed by the amount of books I owned. Over the past few months I let go of quite a few books. In the past few weeks I am more rigorous. Lots of books went into the ‘give away’ box. Disability Study ones are now in new ownership (More to go). Other books I am re-reading, and if I truly love the story, the sentiment, the writing, the author, it will go back on the shelf. Others go into the ever filling box.

It is all very liberating to be honest. And an interesting experiment in what books I liked enough in the past to keep. Some I’d say just ended up on the shelf without a special attachment to them. Some were obviously very much right for a particular time of my life. And of no interest right now. Some are absolute beauties and will stay with me for the rest of my life.

This morning I realised that I also need to let go of my own previously published books*. So, I am offering them to you at half price. I prefer them to be read than stored away in my space. I hope they’ll bring joy to new readers. I hope they will share a tiny nugget of wisdom I gained during two decades of illness. “Hatched”, “Into the Light”, “Cirrus Chronicles”, “Snapshots”, and “Life Outside the Box”. Of some books I only have a few copies left.

                If interested, PLEASE ORDER HERE.

The half price will be calculated on the books.  Please let me know at either Paypal level or via an email to me that you have read about this offer, and I will refund the 50% of the cost of the books via PayPal. (Full postage will be charged.)

If you can make a case for wanting my books but have no funds to pay for them, please DO let me know and we make a deal. Please do let me know.

Please be well. Stay safe. And thank you for your company in person or via cyberspace.


*This offer is not for the ‘Invisible Octopus’ Poem booklet or related art works which can be ordered here.

No comments: